Please don't pee in our pool. We don't swim in your toilet.

Oh summertime is here, and things are breezy. Airy. Light as a feather. I wet the bed last night. And when I say wet, I mean wet. And I'm talking about a lot of pee. I have no idea how it happened. I was supposed to be saved from enuresis by one of those "I'm peeing and must walk to the toilet" dreams. That sort of thing should have jarred me awake, but it didn't.

Maybe, however it was related to the amount of white wine I had consumed before bed. I had a goodly amount, but I should have known better also, because even small amounts of white wine do strange things to my body chemistry. It was a nice vintage, so I decided to drink a few glasses, but in no way was I prepared for what was to happen as a result.

The next morning I awoke in chills, not immediately sure of what had happened. I knew it was unlike any other feeling I had experienced since being 5 years old. I can hold my liquor pretty well, but waking up pools of my own filth at dawn is completely new to me, so I'm not sure what to do or say about it.